I’m not tired, and I’m by myself in Dallas, so I’m going to free write. Feel free to skip over this. Just letting thoughts out. Whoooo. Thoughts. Fair warning, there is probably nothing in here that will be worth reading.
I just ate the worst shit. The only place that delivers after 10pm in Lewisville (Dallas), TX, is this shitty pizza place that looked okay on the brochure. I decided to get the lobster ravioli and a side salad.
It wasn’t good, and now it’s all over my shirt.
Today has been weird. I had to fly to Dallas today for work. I decided to get some music for the trip to make it FLY by. GET IT! FLY. BECAUSE I FLEW. HARHARHAR.
I randomly bought 2 albums from a band I’d never listened to after sampling some of their stuff. Maps & Atlases. You ever have one of those days that is defined by an album? Like you just loop the album all day, and when you remember back on the events of that day, you hear a song from that album? If anyone is 1 reading this, and 2 has heard of them Maps and Atlases, the albums are “Perch Patchwork” and “Beware and Be Grateful”. “Perch Patchwork”, “The Charm”, and “Fever” are my faves so far.
I’m in a strange mood. I have to be up in about 6 hours. I’m not tired at all. I’m full of gross ravioli, and I forgot to get an “itemized receipt”, so now my job isn’t going to cover that gross ravioli as one of my meals for the trip. Also I spilled it on my shirt.
I’ve been buying nicer clothes because of my new job, and I don’t know how I feel about it. I kind of wish people dressed up more in society. Someone asked me the other day if I was required to wear a tie at work. And I said no. But it is smiled upon.
I need to do something with the fact that I’m paranoid, and jealous, and sometimes I’m petty. Tom petty.
I haven’t drank in over a week. That’s the longest I’ve gone without drinking in about a year and a half. Before last week, I hadn’t gone more than maybe 2 days. It’s a lot harder than I thought it would be. I could use a break from drinking…although I’d be lying if I said this was by choice. I worry that I’m not as much fun when I’m not drinking. It’s not that drinking makes me more fun…it’s that not drinking makes me want to drink, and that bums me out a bit and makes me not fun. I also hang out in bars all the time, and then I wonder why I constantly want to drink. I just don’t know what else to do with my time. What do people do? What do people who don’t drink do for fun? To celebrate? Eat shitty lobster ravioli in a hotel by himself?
Not drinking has made me realize some things. One, I thought I hadn’t gotten sick in like a year (except for one weekend), but I realized that the problem was that since I was hungover everyday anyways, there wasn’t much of a way to tell when I was just having a headache or a stomach ache.
The other thing I realized is that it’s not totally alcohol that is to blame for my memory loss. I just can’t remember everything. That’s just the way it is. I thought the reason I couldn’t remember every part of my night vividly was because of alcohol. But I was wrong. It’s because I have a dumb brain.
There is nothing in here that is worth reading. So if you skipped to the bottom to see this, then you were right.
Goodnight friends and jerks
